Issue 24 ● December, 2012
Hey Folks,
This will be the last issue of Where and When for a while as
The Kris & Marlon Show is preparing to go on hiatus in
2013. We plan on doing some recording and resting on our
prickly little laurels. Our agent Murray has accepted a
position booking Mitt Romney on the lecture circuit when he's
not pulling second shift in loss prevention at Rite Aid (Murray
not Mitt). He's cleaning out his desk at the moment and
removing the Snap-On Tool calendar from the wall. So long,
Murray! Thanks for all the swag! FYIFWIW—we will
continue to host the open mic at Windy City Inn first Wednesdays
of each month. Now, there's a few more opportunities to
catch us in 2012, so grab some shirt cardboard from the dry
cleaners and a No. 2 pencil and jot this down.
WED., DECEMBER 5th 9:00PM—WINDY CITY INN
OPEN MIC
2257 W. Irving Park Rd., Chicago, IL 60618
Every first Wednesday of the month Kris and I host a rollicking
open mic at Windy City Inn. Aubrey slings the drinks; the crowd
gets happy; spirited renditions of obscure hits from seldom heard
artists are done; we spill out onto Irving Park Ave., stop
traffic, and do a production number heading West until the police
show up. They join in along with seventy-six trombones, and the
ghost of Meredith Wilson rolls over in his grave with a small
thud. The rights are picked up by Miramax and the movie bombs
dismally on its initial release, but slowly becomes a cult classic
in parts of South America. Definitely something you won't
want to miss. Sign-up starts at 8:30PM.
FRI., DECEMBER 14th
8:00PM―LOVELL'S OF LAKE FOREST
915 S. Waukegan Rd., Lake Forest, IL 60045
On a cold winter's evenin' on a train bound for nowhere,
I met up with the gambler; we were both too tired to sleep.
So we took turns a starin' out the window at the darkness
'Til boredom overtook us, and he began to speak.
He said, "So, I hear The Kris & Marlon Show's going to be
playing in The Captain's Quarter's on Friday the 14th. 'Should be
quite a fun evening. Yessiree, those boys do some kind of whooping
it up in there. I mean, Gol' Dang!
Somewhere in the night, I got up and left my seat. That gambler
just wouldn't shut up.
SAT., DECEMBER 22nd
8:00PM—BRIDIE McKENNA'S
254 Greenbay Road, Highwood, IL 60040
It is time once again for The Kris & Marlon Christmas Show!
There'll be lords-a-leaping, ladies dancing, maids milking—in
other words, a typical evening at Bridie McKenna's. Wear
your Santa hat!
So there you have it! Three extraordinary chances to catch
"The Show" before the final singularity as predicted by the late,
great ethnobotanist Terrence McKenna. Since 2004, Kris and I
have logged 108 gigs in around these whereabouts. We are
sincerely grateful for all the support we've received from you
folks, and we hope you continue to support live music played by
real people with actual instruments. As always, we look
forward to seeing you
where and
when we can.
With warmest regards,
Marlon St. John
312.613.2345 cell
www.marlonstjohn.com
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again at some point.
An out-of-work actor gets
a call from his agent one day. "I’ve got you a job," says his
agent. "That’s great," says the actor, what is it?" "Well,"
says his agent, "it’s a one-liner." "That’s okay," replies the
actor, "I’ve been out of work for so long I’ll take anything.
What’s the line?" "Hark, I hear the cannons roar" says
the agent. "I love it" says the actor, "When’s the audition?"
"Wednesday" says the agent. Wednesday comes and the
actor arrives at the audition. He marches on stage and shouts:
"Hark, I hear the cannons roar". "Brilliant," says the
director, "you’ve got the job. Be here 9 o’clock Saturday
evening." The actor is so happy he got the job that he
goes on a major bender. He wakes up at 8:30 Saturday
evening and runs to the theatre continually repeating his
line; "Hark, I hear the cannons roar, hark, I hear the cannons
roar, hark, I hear the cannons roar." He arrives at the
stage entrance, out of breath and is stopped by the guard.
"Who the hell are you?" asks the guard. "I’m "hark, I hear the
cannons roar." "If you’re "hark I hear the cannons roar",
you’re late. Get up to makeup right now!" So he runs up
to makeup. "Who the hell are you" asks the makeup
girl. "I’m "hark I hear the cannons roar."" "If
you’re hark I hear the cannons roar", you’re late. Sit down
here." And she applies the makeup. "Now quick, get
down to the stage, you’re about to go on." He dashes
down to the stage. "Who the hell are you?" asks the stage
manager. "I’m "hark, I hear the cannons roar."" "You’re "hark,
I hear the cannons roar?" Get out there, the curtain’s about
to go up." He tears onto the stage. The curtains rise,
the house is full. Suddenly there is an almighty bang behind
him, and the actor, startled, shouts "WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?"
